SHITTY BABY IN THE WOODS | OPEN 4th WALL | video/action: Ilex Forest

[peridork]

[ The first and most noticeable thing about the feed is that Peridot is very obviously not human once more. The face that's visible on-screen is back to its usual lime green, and her hair is whipped up into a very un-natural and, frankly, pretty ridiculous looking shape. She also looks terrified, but that's not really unusual in the slightest, especially not to those who already know her.

The camera shakes as she readjusts it. When Peridot speaks up it's at a low, frantic hiss, and in just about every aspect the quality of the video posted makes her look and sound like a horror movie character recording a frantic farewell message for posterity, before the murderer inevitably catches up with her. The camera is angled up from below eye-level, and the light from her Pokegear casts an eerie glow on her face. ]

So I was just minding my own business, trying to take care of my stupid new organic body by walking to use the "bathroom" [ air quotes ] or whatever, when everything got all weird and slow-- Now I'm in some random forest, and apparently time has inexplicably skipped forward by about 3 hours!?!?

[ Ridiculous. That's what this is. She just got here a week ago, and is in no way prepared to deal with this level of nonsense? Like, the giant super powered monsters were already bad enough without all this reality glitching bullshit happening around her.

The look in her eyes when she continues speaking is pleading. Desperate. ]

I'm going to level with whoever's receiving this transmission out there: It's cold, and getting dark, I don't know how to get back to Goldenrod City from here, and worst of all there are thousands of these hideous monster things crawling around everywhere in here and they won't leave me alone! [ Oh god. It kind of looks like she's about to cry. ] Don't let me die out here!

[ As Peridot says all this she has yet to notice the weedle that is currently making itself comfortable atop her ridiculous hairdo, but it sure is visible on camera.

...It might be kinder to just leave her in the dark on that detail. ]

Comments

[peridork]

[ Well then. Peridot has never seen a pony before, let alone a purple one, so she's pretty convinced that this is a talking Pokemon responding to her message, because hey! Every other clearly not-human shaped thing she's seen in this terrible world so far has been one of those little abominations.

But even that's secondary to the explanation she's receiving for all of the weirdness. She sits up a little straighter, looking shell shocked. When she speaks again she's quiet in that way can only be described as a calm before a storm. ]

The fabric of reality... Goes Haywire?

[ ...........

Her free hand gets thrown up angrily. ]

And everyone's just OKAY WITH THIS?!

[ The outburst makes the weedle wobble precariously on it's perch, but it ultimately remains anchored. ]

[friendyousohard]

[Frankly she wouldn't even bother to correct that misconception at this point.]

I don't recall saying we were okay with it, but there's not exactly much we can do. We don't even know why it happens, much less how to stop it.

[peridork]

GGRRRGH... Well then a little bit of warning might have been nice!!!

[ Deep breaths. DEEP BREATHS. ]

Okay. Fine! You said there's a compass on this thing, right? Any advice on getting out of here without getting murdered by monsters?

[ She has both her Elgyem and Houndour with her, but since she's scared of them too, using them hasn't really occurred to her yet. ]

[friendyousohard]

I think we'd all agree with you there.

[Ah, instructions. She can do those.]

I would recommend heading north. Pewter's pretty easy to reach and, thankfully, the wild Pokemon in Ilex aren't terribly strong. What Pokemon do you have with you?

[The idea that this woman might not actually be ready to command her Pokemon in battle yet hasn't really occurred to Twilight.]

[peridork]

[ Peridot answers promptly and professionally, like a scout reporting her findings to a superior officer: ] Elgyem and Houndour, levels 16 and 7, respectively. One a psychic type, the other a dual dark and fire type.

[ Reluctant though she may be to engage with her own Pokemon, she has an excellent memory for detail. ]

[friendyousohard]

Ah, that's actually a pretty good pairing for getting yourself through there. Most of the Pokemon in Ilex are bug type, which are week to fire, and the Weedles and Kakuna are part poison as well, making them vulnerable to psychic.

Of course, both psychic and dark are weak to bug-type attacks as well, but ironically most of the attacks the species in Ilex have at their level qualify as normal or poison type. Just avoid Beedrill and you should be alright.

[peridork]

[ Woah. This Pokemon sure is knowledgeable about, uh. Other Pokemon. Color Peridot impressed! She even looks it for a second, before frowning with mild concern: ]

What's a Beedrill?

[friendyousohard]

Hold on a moment, I'll show you.

[Twilight's as good as her word. It only takes a few seconds for her to get the entry for Beedrill sent over to Peridot.]

Fortunately, they're pretty rare in Ilex.

[peridork]

[She receives the entry and looks at it with increasing dismay. She throws a free hand up.]

Why do so many of you things have literal weapons for body parts!?! [That exclamation trails off with a pathetic squeak.]
[But then she takes a deep breath, strengthening her resolve.] Alright. I'm going to do this.

[friendyousohard]

[It takes Twilight a moment to realize what Peridot means by "you things", and she's about to object, but frankly this isn't the time.

At least her hand didn't smack into the Weedle's stinger or something. Though when she gets moving it's bound to get dislodged...

Maybe it'll just fall behind her and she won't notice.]

Alright. I'll stay on the line as long as you need me... Honestly I don't have anything better to do anyway.